The Cinder-side
2022, Part 1 of 2
How're we doing, friends? I ask out of true sincerity because I feel like there’s a shortage of optimism right now and I’m doing everything I can to keep it from killing my vibe. I know I'm weird for loving New Year's, but blasé attitudes have led me to give people I care about a little tough love because for most of us, the choice is ours and we set the tone. Outputs are often only as good as its inputs.
Inputs
I've started the past few years by writing a two-word brief. The first word is a theme and the second is a call-to-action. I give myself between Jan 1st and Lunar New Year (which is Feb 10th this year) to figure this out, and as of right now, I’m a little annoyed by how far I am from knowing what these two words are. I’ve reviewed 2023 and can feel the vibes I'm working towards in ‘24, but the words remain elusive. They’ll come, though…they always do.
Outputs
The weird thing I've noticed over the last couple of years is that in living out my brief, a reminder or life takeaway of sorts surfaces throughout the year. It comes through my usual form of a one-liner (which I’m known for among friends) that I find myself saying on multiple days and in multiple ways.
Today's post is the first of a two-part-story I'm overdue in sharing because I find writing in chronological order incredibly boring, but since this will get me one step closer to finishing the story that is my job hunt, I’m going to power through this. (If there are abrupt stops and many typos tho, you now know why.)
2022 in review
2022 (not to be mistaken for 2023) was the most challenging year I've faced yet. I love letterpress and this card is one I could’ve sent myself by the end of it. I wrote about four chapters of it here, and as it turns out, there were five. From the perspective of job hunting, here are the noteworthy bits:
Jan-Apr: wrapped up my time with LinkedIn. Interviewed with Company A for a role that started as one thing and turned into another (that included a title and comp demotion). Despite liking leadership, the industry is on the decline and the company culture is known for needing improvement, so I could no longer see this opportunity as net-positive and turned it down.
May-Jul: My personal life took priority. Started interviewing with Company B for a role that I was really excited about. I wrote about it here.
(Now timelines get a little messy because a few months/companies overlapped)
Aug-Oct: Interviewed with Company C where the job had the potential to be great, but culture and leadership gave me that bad feeling in the pit of my stomach…they went with another person and I felt complete relief.
Sep-Nov: Found a great role at Company D that had all of the 'must-haves' and even a few 'nice-to-haves.' The catch? I knew from my first info chat that I was overqualified, but kept it to myself because I really didn't mind. From the initial interview through the case round, I left feeling really good(!), and the recruiter was kind enough to repeatedly validate it. He told me when the final decision would be shared and said he had a good feeling about it. When it was time for our call, I could immediately tell from his tone that it was not going to work out. He said the hiring manager had a change of heart because he realized I was overqualified, to which I shared that I knew I was and didn't mind.
Dec: (not relevant for Part 1 today, but Part 2) Started interviewing with (a) a media & entertainment company and (b) a start-up because I absolutely love the category.
2022 takeaway
After a disappointing outcome with Company D, I was tired and friends could see it. They'd asked how I was feeling, and I would say that I felt like the 'Cinder' side of Cinderella - worthy, but unwanted (which is what I title Chapter 5 of 2022). As for the takeaway that kept resurfacing all year including here, it’s that self-worth is earned. (For the sake of how important I think this is and how much I’ve seen people struggle with really embodying it, I’m saying it again: self. worth. is. earned.)
How you arrive to it matters less than simply arriving (which is why I’m not going into it rn). It can’t be bought. It can’t be faked. And while arriving to it involves external inputs, it’s an internal journey that only you can take.
Parting thoughts
People ask me all the time why my brief is two words, and the answer is simple - a good brief is brief (and unfortunately, too few I’ve seen are good or brief…)
In reading today’s post, I could understand why someone would be inclined to wonder if I think too highly of myself; maybe to you, I do. All I have to say in response is that the hardest thing about my job hunt was routinely assessing where I was on the spectrum that spans between gratitude and entitlement. As a child of immigrants who have overcome so so much, I'm extremely comfortable navigating life with a decent attitude and an abundance of gratitude. It's why I was relieved when opportunities that I would've felt some kind of responsibility in accepting (e.g., Company C) didn't actually pan out. So am I entitled? Based on where I know my work sits relative to the market and the opportunity that I was looking for, I didn’t and still don’t think so. But it’s a question I think about often and one I ask those I trust most to keep me honest about.
I believe an effective process is mechanically structured around four things: good inputs, outputs, sequence, and outcomes. I feel silly saying this because of how obvious this sounds, and yet, I find that we tend to overcomplicate it and focus on the wrong things at the wrong times. I haven’t talked about outcomes until now because they don’t entirely matter at this point (they do in Part 2); the energy people spend on outcomes should really be redirected to inputs. I say this because if we think about this year ahead, I recommend focusing on what we have the most control over (i.e., inputs) and trust that the process works when done well (i.e., make sure your inputs are actually good ones).
Wanna know something wild?? Little did I know when I used Cinderella to explain how I felt that I would soon hear from my fairy godmother. Until Part 2…!
loved this and reiterated our convo perfectly.